There are certain mysteries in the world that will forever remain unsolved.
Why do people insist on walking at a glacial pace in front of you when you’re in a rush?
What did people actually do during that strange time in history when they had to navigate with physical maps? (I mean, really, how did they survive?)
And why, oh why, are some job interviews seemingly less about assessing your skills and more about finding any excuse, however bizarre, to send you packing?
Because, let’s be honest, there are some truly ridiculous reasons candidates have been rejected. Reasons so absurd, you’d be forgiven for thinking that an episode of a sitcom had bled into real life.
The Fashion Faux Pas
Ah, the age-old art of dressing for success.
But sometimes, even the most sartorially sophisticated of us fall victim to the unforgiving gaze of the fashion police… or, in this case, the hiring manager.
"I once had a candidate rejected because their socks didn’t match."
Now, I know what you’re thinking. Socks are a crucial part of any skill set assessment, right? Of course not, but try telling that to someone who apparently bases hiring decisions on foot fashion.
Another gem:
"We can’t hire someone who wears a red tie. It’s too aggressive."
Of course, the colour of one’s neckwear must be aligned with the company’s aura. Can’t have employees wandering around, blazing trails of aggression with their bold fashion choices.
The Oddball Questions
Interviews often include questions designed to gauge your thought process.
But sometimes, these questions veer wildly off course, plunging headlong into the realm of the surreal.
"Describe yourself in five emojis."
Forget your degree, your experience, or your unparalleled work ethic. What they really need to know is how you express your essence through cartoonish digital expressions. 🦄💼🎩🌟🚀
Or how about:
"If you were a kitchen appliance, which would you be and why?"
If you answered “blender” because you’re great at mixing things up… you’re hired!
The Bizarre Background Checks
In the world of recruitment, background checks are par for the course. But sometimes, they border on the utterly nonsensical.
"We had to reject a candidate because they had a MySpace page."
Imagine being held accountable for a relic from the early 2000s. Next thing you know, you’ll be fired for using a Walkman or knowing the lyrics to a Spice Girls song.
And then there’s this one:
"The candidate was rejected because their birth sign was incompatible with the company’s values."
Yes, because everyone knows that a Leo’s propensity for drama is a terrible match for a company striving for modest financial gains in Q3.
The Unwritten Rules
Sometimes, you find yourself blindsided by rules you didn’t even know existed.
"We couldn’t hire someone who didn’t make eye contact with the receptionist."
Because, as everyone knows, the receptionist is the gatekeeper to the entire kingdom. Fail to acknowledge them, and you’re essentially banished to the wilderness forever.
Or how about:
"The candidate didn’t send a thank-you email, so we won’t be moving forward."
Perhaps the candidate was busy, lost their Wi-Fi signal, or maybe they were still recovering from the shock of being asked about kitchen appliances and their compatibility with a company’s values.
And Yet…
Despite the madness, candidates soldier on, navigating the murky waters of interviews and hoping the next one won’t include an enforced team-building exercise with sock puppets.
Because, at the end of the day, everyone’s just trying to land the job without having their moon sign scrutinised or their tie colour critiqued by the higher-ups.
Need to Recruit Sans the Nonsense?
If you’ve read this and thought, “Hang on, are we doing the same thing?” – fear not, we can help.
At Coburg Banks, we take a more rational approach to recruitment, where candidates are assessed on their skills, not their astrological charts.
If you want to recruit like a sane person and not a character in a surreal comedy, get in touch. We promise not to overanalyze your fashion choices or turn you away for not knowing your blender from your toaster.
Well, probably.
