We all know that the job market can be a brutal, cutthroat arena where only the clever, the competent, and occasionally the downright lucky survive.
But every now and then, a candidate decides that the best way to distinguish themselves from the throng of applicants is not with an impressive CV, meaningful experience, or even just being a decent human being.
No, some brave souls think outside the box—and sometimes, right out of the realm of sanity.
In theory, standing out is crucial. But in practice? Well, let’s just say there are some methods that should be approached with extreme caution, or perhaps just avoided altogether.
1. The Musical Résumé
Imagine this: your inbox pings with a new application. There's no PDF attached, no Word document, just an MP3 file titled “Why I’m Perfect for the Job.”
Curious, you click play, and suddenly you’re listening to a full-blown musical number complete with a karaoke backing track and questionable rhymes.
While creativity is always welcome, remember this: there’s a fine line between standing out and sounding like a contestant auditioning for a local talent show.
Especially when your high notes sound like a cat trapped in a washing machine.
2. The Over-the-Top Brag
We all know you have to sell yourself on a CV. But there’s a difference between showcasing your skills and what can only be described as “delusions of grandeur.”
One candidate once claimed:
“I have never failed at anything in my entire life. I can solve any problem in the universe.”
Really? Because we’re pretty sure your latest problem-solving challenge will be finding another role after we delete your application.
Remember, confidence is key, but so is credibility.
3. The Gimmicky Gift
Some candidates send chocolates or cupcakes to sweeten the deal—or so they think.
But when you’re trying to win over a potential employer, a box of hastily purchased, heart-shaped chocolates isn’t always the way to their heart.
Especially when they turn out to be stale.
And, let’s be honest, a “bribe” isn’t always the best method to demonstrate professionalism.
4. The Outlandishly Inappropriate Outfit
Here’s a tip: dressing to impress doesn’t mean dressing like you’re auditioning for the next James Bond film—or worse, an extra in a comedy sketch.
We’ve seen it all: the tuxedo complete with top hat and cane, the full superhero costume, and even the person who arrived in a wedding dress.
It’s great to show your unique style, but maybe leave the cape and spandex at home.
5. The Insane Reference
References are supposed to vouch for your character and work ethic. But when your only reference is your dog—yes, your actual dog—you might need to reassess your approach.
While we’re sure Fido has lots of nice things to say about your walkies skills, it doesn’t quite convince employers of your project management capabilities.
Stick to human references. Preferably ones that can actually speak.
6. The Novel-Length Cover Letter
We’re all for providing detailed information, but when your cover letter is longer than “War and Peace,” you’ve lost us.
One applicant sent a 20-page manifesto detailing every single job they’d ever had, along with a personal reflection on each.
By page five, we were questioning our life choices. By page ten, we were questioning theirs.
7. The Ridiculous Job Title
We’ve seen candidates applying as “Chief Happiness Officer” or even “Marketing Rockstar.”
And while they certainly grab our attention, they also make us question how seriously the candidate takes the application process.
Keep it simple and professional. Save the rockstar antics for the weekend.
8. The Out-of-Date Pop Culture Reference
Using pop culture references can be fun, but when your entire application is based on jokes from a sitcom that ended a decade ago, it might be time to update your material.
We love a good “Friends” reference as much as the next person, but dating your application back to the ‘90s? Not so much.
9. The Threatening Approach
Believe it or not, some candidates think threatening their potential employer is a brilliant idea.
One particularly memorable line read:
“If you don’t hire me, I’ll work for your competitor and make them ten times more successful.”
That’s one way to ensure instant rejection.
Remember, charm wins over threats. Every time.
10. The Bizarre Hobby
It’s great to show you have interests outside work, but maybe omit anything that might raise an eyebrow in the wrong way.
“Collecting celebrity toenail clippings” might be your passion, but perhaps save that revelation for after you’ve secured the job offer.
Need to Recruit Candidates Who Stand Out for the Right Reasons?
If you’re tired of wading through applications that make you want to question the state of humanity, let us help.
At Coburg Banks, we specialise in finding candidates who stand out because of their skills and experience, not their ability to perform interpretative dance numbers.
Get in touch if you’re ready to recruit with confidence—and a healthy dose of sanity.
