There are many ways to impress potential employers, but there are just as many ways to blow your chances faster than you can say, “I thought the interview was tomorrow.”
Whether you’re an expert at self-sabotage or simply oblivious to how reality works, there are certain faux pas that guarantee you’ll lose that coveted job offer in record time.
So, in the spirit of helping you avoid these pitfalls (and providing a little Friday entertainment), here are some surefire ways to torpedo a job offer faster than a caffeine-fueled squirrel on roller skates.
1. The Fashion Faux Pas
The first impression is crucial during the interview process, and nothing screams “don’t hire me” like rocking up dressed as if you’re off to a beach party.
Flip-flops? Check. Sunglasses indoors? Check. Hawaiian shirt that would make even the most laid-back surfer cringe? Check.
It’s a bold strategy, but it’s not going to win you points in the corporate world unless you’re applying for the position of ‘Chief Fun Officer’ at a surf shack.
2. The Over-Sharing Moment
We all know interviews are the time to shine, but there’s a fine line between being open and treating the interviewer like your therapist.
When asked why you left your last job, responding with:
“Well, it all started with my ex. You see, we broke up, and then I was like, you know what, I’m going to quit my job and travel the world to find myself. But then I realized I didn’t have the funds, so here I am.”
A simple “I was looking for new challenges” would have sufficed.
3. The Digital Disaster
Your online presence is often the first thing employers check - and if your social media is a treasure trove of questionable content, it’s time to rethink your strategy.
That photo of you doing the worm at a wedding? Maybe not the worst thing.
But the endless stream of posts detailing your love for conspiracy theories and your fondness for starting Twitter wars? Yeah, that’s a hard pass.
4. The Awkward Silence
There’s a difference between being thoughtful and being utterly unprepared.
When the interviewer asks:
“So, what attracted you to this role?”
And you sit there in silence for 45 seconds, staring into the distance as if the answer might materialize in the air…
It’s not the grand reveal they were hoping for.
5. The Unsolicited Critique
Job interviews are not the time to provide feedback on the company’s branding, office decor, or the interviewer’s choice of tie.
Comments like:
“You know, this place would look so much better with some exposed brick and a few bean bags.”
Might get you a job offer from an interior design firm, but it’s not what the average bank is looking for.
6. The Over-Confident Approach
Confidence is key, but borderline arrogance is not the way to go.
Telling your potential employer:
“I’ll have your job in a year.”
Might sound ambitious in your head, but it’s more likely to get you shown the door rather than given the keys to the executive washroom.
7. The Scheduling Snafu
Rocking up on the wrong day or time is a classic way to give the impression you’re not really that interested in the role.
And if you do manage to arrive on the right day but at the wrong office because you didn’t check the address? Well, at least you’ll have a fun story to tell your friends about the job offer that wasn’t.
8. The Salary Surprise
When discussing salary expectations, keep things grounded in reality.
Responding with:
“Well, I was thinking six figures would be a good starting point.”
Might seem like shooting for the moon, but if you’re applying for an entry-level position, it’s more like aiming for Pluto.
And not in a good way.
9. The Exit Without a Thank You
Leaving an interview without a polite thank you, handshake, or even a smile is a surefire way to leave a bad taste in the interviewer’s mouth.
Remember, you want them to think of you fondly, not as the candidate who bolted out of the door as if the building was on fire.
10. The Follow-Up Blunder
The follow-up email is an art form in itself. Balance is key - you want to be enthusiastic but not desperate.
Writing an email that reads like a love letter:
“I’ve never felt so connected to a position before. I dream about spreadsheets now. Please hire me, or my career is over.”
Might make them question not just your professionalism, but also your mental state.
Need Help Hiring People Who Won’t Mess It Up?
If you’re tired of candidates who make these classic blunders, we can help.
At Coburg Banks, we find people who nail interviews and don’t lose job offers because they turned up in a panda suit.
So, if you need to recruit (and avoid this madness), get in touch.
We promise our candidates know how to handle an interview without treating it like a stand-up routine.
