Ah, the exit interview. It’s that final hurdle in the employment race, where employees are supposed to gracefully bow out, offering constructive feedback and perhaps a compliment or two. But in reality, it can be a moment of unfiltered brilliance—a chance for departing employees to finally say what’s been eating at them for years.
And sometimes, it’s downright hilarious.
Because while most of us might mumble something about “seeking new opportunities” or “wanting a change of scenery,” others embrace the moment to deliver a mic-drop worthy performance that leaves HR scrambling for words.
1. The One with the Secret Soundtrack
One employee, who clearly missed their calling as a sound designer, decided to give their exit interview a little atmosphere.
Midway through the meeting, they pressed a button on their phone, and suddenly, a dramatic orchestral score filled the room.
As if narrating the climax of an epic saga, they declared:
“I am leaving because I am destined for greater things. Things you could never imagine!”
They then proceeded to walk out, leaving the HR manager alone, utterly dumbfounded, as the music swelled to a crescendo.
2. The ‘Honest’ Feedback Form
Feedback forms are a staple of exit interviews, but one employee decided to use theirs as a canvas for creative expression.
When asked to rate their experience, they simply wrote:
“Like being stuck on a never-ending flight with screaming babies and no legroom.”
And when asked how the company could improve, they replied:
“Install a trapdoor under my boss’s desk. Just in case.”
It was brutal, but you can't deny the creativity.
3. The Culinary Critic
In an office where the weekly team lunch was sacrosanct, one unhappy employee decided to channel their inner food critic in their exit interview.
They detailed, in excruciatingly vivid prose, each of the culinary disasters inflicted upon them over the years.
“The pizza was consistently soggy, the sushi was a crime against Japan, and the chicken wrap had the flavour profile of a damp sock.”
The HR manager, to their credit, promised to share the feedback with the catering company.
4. The One with the Unforgettable Parting Gift
A departing employee decided to leave a lasting impression with a parting gift for their colleagues—a mounted portrait of themselves, captioned:
“In loving memory of my sanity.”
They presented it during the exit interview with the explanation:
“I’m leaving, but my spirit will always haunt the break room.”
It now hangs, proudly, as a testament to their wit and perhaps a reminder to the HR team about “culture fit.”
5. The Haiku Master
Some veer towards the poetic when given the chance, and one employee decided to express their feelings in haiku form:
“Days of endless grind
Boss demands the impossible
I need my freedom.”
The HR team, unsure whether to applaud or seek clarity, simply nodded and jotted it down.
6. The Confessional
And sometimes, an exit interview is the stage for confessions:
One employee admitted to a long-standing prank:
“I’ve been swapping the decaf and regular coffee for months. You all run on decaf.”
Silence fell as the HR manager struggled to process the ramifications of a caffeine-deprived workforce.
7. The Unexpected Roast
Some people see their exit interview as their Comedy Central roast:
“Working here was like being in a sitcom. Too bad I wasn’t the main character.”
It’s not every day HR gets to enjoy such a blend of honesty and humour.
8. The One Who Brought Backup
In an unprecedented move, one employee turned up with a ‘support team’: a group of friends who sat silently, each holding placards that read:
- “He’s right, you know.”
- “Listen to him.”
- “Truth bombs incoming.”
It was a bold move, and the HR manager found themselves in a very unique showdown.
9. The Future Fortune Teller
Then there was the employee who decided to leave a ‘fortune’ for each member of the HR team:
“In three months, new software will break the system. You’ll blame the intern.”
And surprisingly, some of these prophecies came true.
10. The Long Goodbye
Finally, there’s the one who simply refused to leave: they brought a sleeping bag and camped out in the HR office, claiming:
“Until you offer me a raise, I live here now.”
No one knew whether to admire their dedication or question their sanity.
Need to Hire People Who Make Exit Interviews Unnecessary?
If you find yourself nodding along with tales of chaotic exit interviews, perhaps it’s time to reconsider your hiring strategy.
At Coburg Banks, we help you find candidates who are committed, well-suited, and actually fit your company culture—so they stick around longer and leave the pranks to April Fool’s Day.
Get in touch with us if you need to recruit without the drama.
We promise to match you with professionals who won’t leave mysterious prophecies or bring along a soundtrack.
